November 25, 2013
It has been over a month since I've written but we have been slowly settling back into life as we used to know it. Jimmy is feeling really good these days. His scar looks good and he hardly has any pain at all. He is finally back to work and we are taking life one day at a time. We are enjoying all of the little things in life that we took for granted before this terrible journey.
Life certainly has a new kind of meaning these days. We are all so thankful that Jimmy has gotten through this year as well as he did. At the beginning of 2013 we didn't know what to expect and of course, we feared the worst possible outcome. It has been a stressful, sad and traumatic year but I am so happy that he is alive and feeling better every day. I can't imagine life without him (even though there are days when I don't like him so much...LOL) and I can't imagine Logan not having his Dad around to watch him grown up.
I also have to say thank you to those of you who have read my blog. This has been so helpful for me to be able to write things down and say how I feel. I have written things in my blog that I wouldn't say directly to Jimmy for fear of hurting his feelings. Writing things down gave me the courage to lay it all out on the line and vent when I needed to do so. I would often write and cry at the same time because I didn't know what else to do. Writing this blog has really been my safe haven through all of this.
I am hopeful that, with God's help, we will never have to experience another year like 2013. I do not want to see Jimmy weak and helpless like he was at the end of chemotherapy treatments or how tired and incapacitated he was after radiation and surgery. I do not want to feel like my world is crumbling under my feet and there is nothing I can do about it. And, I definitely do not want our son, Logan, to have to experience the angst and sadness that he has experienced this year ever again. Watching him try to deal with Jimmy being sick broke my heart. In the beginning, we could try and shelter him from what was to come but when Jimmy started to get sick, lose his hair and become really tired and weak, we couldn't do that anymore. This year has really taken its toll on all of us and we are forever changed but we have become so much closer as a family and I am thankful for that.
So, I write today to say thank you, God, for allowing my family to have so much to be thankful for this coming Thanksgiving Day. For those of you who do not celebrate Thanksgiving Day, please take a moment to remember what you are thankful for in your life.
Jimmy will have his first scan after surgery next month. I will be sure to let all of you know how it goes.
HAPPY THANKSGIVING EVERYONE AND GOD BLESS!
